From its modest beginnings in Southern California's San Fernando Valley, Valgol is enjoying a dramatic surge of popularity across the industry. Valgol commands include really, like, well, and y*know. Variables are assigned with the =like and =totally operators. Other operators include the California Booleans, fersure and noway. Repetitions of code are handled in for/sure loops.

Here is a sample Valgol program:

        like y*know (I mean) start

        if pizza =like bitchen and

          b =like tubular and
          c =like grodyax

        then

          for I =like to oh maybe 100
            do wah -(ditty)
            barf(1) =totally gross(out)
          sure

        like bag this problem

        really

        like totally (y*know)

This sort of top-down, procedural code has no place in modern programming, of course, but I'm sure a suitable object oriented (or perhaps objectionably oriented) equivalent could easily be contrived.

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Category: Coffee and Cats
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